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Dear ReaderBefore you throw this awful book to the ground and run as far away from it as possible you should probably know why This book is the only one which describes every last detail of the Baudelaire children's miserable stay at Heimlich Hospital which makes it one of the most dreadful books in the worldThere are many pleasant things to read about but this book contains none of them Within its pages are such burdensome details as a suspicious shopkeeper unnecessary surgery an intercom system anaesthesia heart shaped balloons and some very startling news about a fire Clearly you do not want to read about such thingsI have sworn to research this story and to write it down as best I can so I should know that this book is something best left on the ground where you undoubtedly found itWith all due respectLemony Snicket


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    Is this the CREEPIEST ONE or what?? Also yes still continuing my reread as I watch the S2 of Netflix's versionand there's only one left before the season ends sobsob So this one always freaked me out as a smolreader and now as a slightly tolreader it still freaks me out Glad to see I've matured But it's a hospital and there are rusty knives and decapitation plots AND PEOPLE WONDER WHY I READ DARK BOOKS NOW AS AN ADULTAlso I have questions about why this hospital was so filthy and if anyone actually took care of the other patients???And the subplot of cheerfulness will get you better than modern medicine is incredibly ironic considering Lemony Snicket is the most depressed chronicler ever THE IRONIES HERE WOWAnd I think Mr Snicket has the best bio for this one in all the booksLemony Snicket is widely regarded as one of the most difficult children's authors to capture and imprison Recently he had to give up on his hobbies due to laws regarding musical performances in mountainous terrain Most things written about him are not true but this isAs an author myself I long for the day when I too can have such a comprehensive and impressive author bio