[ Prime ] Chase in ShadowAuthor Amy Lane – 91videos.co

Chase Summers Golden Boy Beautiful Girlfriend, Good Friends, And A Promising Future Nobody Knows The Real ChaseChase Summers Has A Razor Blade To His Wrist And The Smell Of His Lover S Goodbye Clinging To His Skin He Has A Door In His Heart So Frightening He D Rather Die Than Open It, And The Lies He S Used To Block It Shut Are Thinning With Every Forbidden Touch Chase Has Spent His Entire Life Unraveling, And His Decision To Set His Sexuality Free In Secret Has Only Torn His Mind Apart Faster Chase Has One Chance For True Love And Salvation He May Have Met Tommy Halloran In The World Of Gay For Pay Where The Number Of Lovers Doesn T Matter As Long As The Come Shot S Good But If He Wants The Healing That Tommy S Love Has To Offer, He Ll Need The Courage To Leave The Shadows For The Sunlight That May Be Too Much To Ask From A Man Who S Spent His Entire Life Hiding His True Self Chase Knows All Too Well That The Only Things Thriving In A Heart S Darkness Are The Bitter Personal Demons That Love To Watch Us Bleed

10 thoughts on “Chase in Shadow

  1. says:

    Damn you, Amy Lane I had things to do today, plans, obligations I had my own writing too, and I left my guys waiting in the middle of a freaking sex scene to finish this book and watch you bring Chase and Tommy safely home.Chase is a very young man who is trying to be a good person He tries so hard to do the right thing, while locking his fears and pain and demons away in his head behind a red door He s gay and he can t admit it, can t even think about it Then a comment from a friend suggests a way out Straight guys do gay porn, right It gives Chase added income, but importantly it lets him touch and be touched, by men whose bodies turn him on far than the girlfriend he lives with and loves like a sister But doing gay porn puts a strain on that red door in his head As he gets to know the men, and begins to fall in real love with Tommy, he moves deeper and deeper into deception Something has to give His closet, his heart, his mind, his life something.This is another of Amy Lane s intense stories, about a man with a painful past who will find his way into your heart and break it, little by little But thank God she writes romance, and so at the end of the deception and discovery, the worry and the pain, there is love Highly recommended.

  2. says:

    I had three thoughts when I finished this book 1 I LOVED this book too much, and damn I m a glutton for angst, because I m actually giddy.2 Amy Lane may not be for everyone, but her books ROCK MY WORLD3 I wonder when the next one is coming out Now the storyThe Broken Boy Self Destructive Fuckery, thy name is Chase Chance SummersChase Summers is a young man who has been tampering with the reality of what and who he is his whole life A horrible childhood, a mother who took her own life, an abusive, bigot father who probably drove her to it Not nice things to remember So, he stores the bad stuff in a place in his mind, where he can keep it from touching anyone else in his life It s killing him sure, every day he s closer to just coming apart But he sticks to his plan He has it all worked out, and he has a lot of duct tape.Chase has a life , beautiful fiancee he loves, best friends who are loyal, he s a good athlete, makes a lot of money, and he s in school to be an engineer From the outside it all looks shiny and perfect Well, it s all built on lies Doesn t matter though, he has plan for the future all worked out in his head All with the appropriate figures, girl, boy, babiesIt s all a charade He is not happy He is not straight What he actually is, is a man in the closet, working as a gay porn actor, lying to his fiancee, his friends, being incredibly unfair to his lover HE IS MISERABLE We meet Chase at his lowest, when the stitching of all the webs he has woven have begun to come apart He has come undone.The Warrior Tommy MOTHERFUCKING PERFECTION Halloran Tommy Tango Halloran, is an actor for Johnnies the same porn studio that Chase works for From the first moment Chase sees Tommy, he wants him, to know him, talk to him, touch him He just WANTS They meet, and they fall in love In the midst of the clusterfuck that is Chase s life, Tommy and Chase fall in love, and make a home Chase is selfish with Tommy, demands from him things that he can t give in return But Tommy gives them anyways, because he may not be broken, but he has cracks, and the only thing that has ever felt like it can fix them is Chase And they hurt each other, but they fix each other too, and those really fucking great moments they have of outrageous love, are just amazing They manage to build something strong, even while Chase is living what sometimes seems like a dozen lives Tommy doesn t give up on Chase, he knows what Chase needs to do, he has to let the walls down, and that poison that is inside him needs to come out Tommy doesn t stop pushing and fighting He knows, HE KNOWS that Chase can be the man he wants to be, he can have that future he has planned, he just needs to adjust it a little.The Cavalry Who said the good guys can t be porn stars In true Amy Lane fashion there were plenty characters to fall in love with in this book than I could manage In this story she gave us a look in to the porn industry that was very benevolent Healthy work environment, with good guys that were good friends There was drama of course, but their role was to be Tommy and Chase s support system It worked well, I think adding to the crazy stew that was Chase would have been too much I loved these guys Dex the responsible one, the leader, Kane the crazy hyper bunny, Ethan the guy that just wants to be loved, John the porn mogul that was a really great guy They were awesome and added a whole hell of a lot to this story They are all a bit frayed, but they were also good people.There were also Chase s childhood friends Donnie and Kevin who were strong and THERE The therapist, and even the fiancee Mercy ,who was a strange character for me, but ended up being someone really important.I know this book may not work for everyone Chase is difficult to figure out I just didn t understand what he was doing He was a living contradiction He didn t even know what he was hiding from He just wanted to be loved, and he WAS, just not by the right person It s hard to like a guy who is blatantly duplicitous and hypocritical But Chase is so broken, and so exposed it s hard not to care for him I just wanted him to get better He couldn t do it on his own though Tommy, he had to help him It ll be hard for some readers to stomach the way Tommy just let Chase get away with EVERYTHING He hurts him bad But hey, who the fuck am I to judge how a guy that lived with what Chase had to live with dealt with his shit Chase s story is not pretty, but in all his lying the his tale is honest He figures it out, he does It s just ugly, no way a shit storm like the one Chase had been brewing could happen without taking a few towns out in the process Apart from that in terms of format, this story is jumpy, we get a lot of glimpses from different times, that kind of go back and forth Worked for me, but it is different The opening for every chapter was really different, and for me a cool fucking trickFelt like an opening scene of a film and we re kind of zoomed into the moment That was BADASS.There was an unexpected surprise, which threw me off for like a second, but Tommy and Chase got me back on track almost immediately There were also some strong similarities in the way things evolved in some parts to another book by Ms Lane.It s a big story this one Like an onion Layers and layers of drama, angst, lies, deception, grief, frustration, joy, sexyness, outrageously strong love, endurance, bad shit, good outcomes, happiness, redemption, resilience It s got it all baby.HAPPY ENDING YOU ASK Get your hankies ready, because this boys will have you singing HALLELUJAH by the time it s all said and done I was anyways.Do I recommend Three words It s AMY LANE.

  3. says:

    Amy Lane s Johnnies series I mean this is Amy rip your heart out Lane we re talking about I love when she tears me to pieces I m an Amy Lane specific masochistic I was like, DO YOUR WORST I m ready Somehow I read all of the other books in the Johnnies series before this one, the one that started it all In fact, Dex in Blue was my first Amy Lane The characters from Chase in Shadow are mentioned over and over in the other two books in the series, so I had a VERY good idea about the tidal wave of angst that this book would send my way.When I saw that the audiobook was up for review, I jumped right on it I d heard about Sean Crisden for ages among audiobook buffs so I couldn t wait to get my grabby hands err, ears on it I ll talk a little about the narrator first While I don t think that Sean Crisden has a particularly sexy voice, he does have silly putty vocal chords that he can bend any way his heart desires He managed to make each Johnnies character instantly recognizable, which is a HUGE thing with audiobooks Some voices I loved than others Chase s voice was a little nasally for my taste but I got that that was the voice that Sean envisioned for the character so I didn t mind it The intonations were good, the reading was good, and, all in all, I think that Sean Crisden did an excellent job Now on to the story itself I loved the intensity of Chase and Tommy s relationship I didn t mind the quick jump to love as much as I usually do and I thought that there was a ton of passion between them I got them as a couple and I think that Amy Lane did a great job of showing them both as flawed but empathetic people Cheating isn t my favorite of subjects but I really am flexible with my boundaries on that Some of my most loved reads have MCs that have started as cheaters Whether or not I like a book like that is totally dependent on the author s treatment of the subject and I really liked how Amy Lane did it here I understood Chase, even if I didn t always agree with him, and I loved seeing his mental and emotional struggles So what didn t I like Well, I thought that some of the psychiatric imagery was a bit heavy handed and repetitive Without giving spoilers, I thought that a lot of Chase s emotional issues were drawn out to the point that I was kind of over listening about them does that sound heartless I also thought that some of the time space transitions were a little jumpy So did this book satisfy my Amy Lane angst fetish HELL YES It was a great audiobook and a nice, painful hurts so good kind of read Bring on the porn stars, I m ready for Copy provided by the publisher in exchange for an honest review

  4. says:

    5 13 17 Re read three times already and still one of my favorites I did it I ve been wanting to read this one for so longbut after reading all the Goodreads reviews.I got a bit scared.I m going to be honestthis one is pretty angsty I ve actually read the second book in this series first which I loved , because I was too scared to start this one So I finally just put on my big girl panties and jumped in I m very glad I didbutI m exhausted In a good way though, because I did love this book Now I m not gonna do a whole recap about the story, because there are plenty reviews for this book on GR already, and I also don t want to spoiler too much of the storyline.I am gonna tell you that this one is indeed angsty At times it drove me to drink It s also sad, sexy, romantic and even sweet.I loved all the guys from Johnnies But I did spend a good part of the book being pissed off at Chase He was such a douchebag asshole But once I got to know about him, and what was going on in his head my feelings for him changed I still think he made mistakes, but damn ithe didn t mean to fuck everything up and I think he blamed himself than anybody else could have ever done I felt so bad for Chase and TommyGod I loved Tommy, he was freaking awesome I just wished we could have gotten about the future I m sure they will make an appearance in all the other books, but that s just not the same I wanted about just the two them and how everything turned out I guess I m greedy that way Now I know some of you will want to now if this book was hot Fuck yeah it was.damn it s about gay for pay pornstars Don t get me wrong, there is real, honest to god love in this book, but there are also some very very nice steamy scenes

    But a warningif you hate cheating, or you hate the hero having sex with other people.you may want to skip this one

    5 big fat stars from me Now if you ll excuse me.I need another drink P

    This review is posted on Wendy s Wycked Words

  5. says:

    1.85 it s me,not the book starsWarning Rant i call Review Ahead and Maybe SpoilersEven Sean Crisden, couldn t save this for me.Called it quits at 89%, i just couldn t take it any The only character i felt sympathy for had to go and do a stupid thing to make me dislike her. ummmm I have been trying to read this for a long time but i kept giving up, so when i saw there was an audio book and the narrator is Sean Crisden, i decided to give it another try, clearly i failed in my attempt I still don t mesh well with this author s writing but i am not giving up yet.Why i didn t love it Chase ChanceThe MC, i really didn t like him at all, couldn t connect with him, i was angry at him for his stupid choices and couldn t really understand those choices He was a douche His words not mine So basically Chase Chance is gay, pretending to be straight he has a girlfriend , decides to do gay for pay, have sex on camera for money with other guys to satisfy himself while the whole time pretending he is straight He meets Tommy Tango he starts a relationship with him, but still cannot break up with the girlfriend because of reasons that are really not reasons The writing style was very confusing One minute Chase is with his girlfriend, the next he is with Tommy having sex I had to pause the audio, try again then rewind and see if i missed something This is where i got so pissed Mercy the girlfriend, IMO from the beginning she was a victim of Chase s stupid choices and cheating then, out of nowhere she was made the villian, view spoiler we are told that she messed with the condoms and got pregnant like really seriously why not let the girl go in peace, lick her wounds after all Chase cheated on her throughout the whole book Why make her a bad person hide spoiler

  6. says:

    This is a love story, beautiful and tragic in it s tale which will captivate you and hold your heart to ransom right to the very end..4.5 stars At times during this book, I actually found it hard to read and not in a bad way, but because there is such profound raw emotion and heartbreak hiding behind the persona that is Chase Summers He is 20 years old and in my eyes he was still a boya boy that lost his way in life 14 years earlier when the tragic death of his mother leaves him with the bigoted, abusive drunk that was his father.This event and the subsequent years with his so called father shaped his life and his psych and neither were pretty Chase compartmentalized his life, put it in boxes, keeping them separate from each other and any leak of emotion between these compartments would be the undoing of him and his sanity..and this is exactly where Amy Lane takes us Chase Summers.wants the world to see and hear perfection, every action and word spoken controlled, he wants what all conformists want, the house, the car, beautiful wife and the career to be able to live his dream But that s what it isa dream, he has the girlfriend and he loves her, but not how a man should love a woman, he is living a lie and when he lacks the funds to fuel his fantasy, he turns to a Gay for pay internet porn site and his other persona, Chance, appears.Chance the Porn Star.6 all toned and buff, blue eyes and blond hair, sexy voice and a killer smile He is confident and a little cocky He has no inhibitions and is cool and nonchalant To Chance life is fun, he laughs and relaxes with men who are definitely not shy and are comfortable with their own sexuality But even amongst these friends there is another layer of deceit Chance is pretending to be a straight guy having gay sex..another lie Inner Chase.is the voice of honesty in his head that nobody hears He is the Squuueee fangirl at the thought of being with a man The exhibitionist that just wants to be out with all the pretty boys and get down and dirty with it Inner Chase just wants to be free.he is the voice of the guilt for cheating on his girlfriend, the voice of heartbreak and overwhelming love and affection for the man who holds his heart and the voice of despair for hurting all those in his life that he loves with his lies Inner Chase is GAY and he is trying to hold it all together.When Chase and Tommy meet, those compartments that Chase has been so fastidious about keeping separate, start to bleed together Their love is beautiful and unconditional, the chemistry and affection palpable, only with Tommy can he be honest and open, only with Tommy can Chase be the man he is supposed to be But these two lost souls, each with deep emotional issues that any normal person would seek counselling for, are enabling each other Tommy is becoming insecure and vulnerable and Chase is tumbling deeper into the void of the Red Roomwhere he keeps all of his pain safely lockedonly now, it is ready to burst open.Amy Lane did a great job of letting us get to know not only our two MC s Chase and Tommy, but also the whole host of other character s, all of which had a face, voice and personality of their own It took me a little while to warm to Chase, as there is a lot to take in initially and I did get a little frustrated with the dipping in and out of the here and now.I just wanted certain parts to flow easily Having said that at the half way point I was totally engrossed and was unable to put it down until it was finished.I am also very happy to see that we will be getting Dex and Kane s story in October.this will be a must read for me.

  7. says:

    4.5 Painful Stars Yes Yes I want something true I want you I want you so bad Oh, my heart This book broke it I knew that it was going to be an emotional read just by reading the blurb, BUT, I didn t know how intense it would be What a journey.Chase Chance Summers seems to have it all He has a perfect girlfriend he loves, great friends who adore him and he goes to school and it looks like he may have a successful future Like I said, it seems like nothing wrong could ever happen to the flawless Chase That could not be further from the truth Deep inside Chase is hurting and his whole life is a lie He has a secret and wants to keep it that way But, he can t stay in the closet forever He ends up becoming another version of himself that does exactly what he wishes he could do to men, by working on a porn site as gay for pay.This is where he meets Tommy Tango Halloran, a fellow porn star who understands him, supports him, listens to him, gets to know him almost completely and still is at Chase s side But Tommy has demons of his own They are both broken but together they make each other feel whole There were moments where reading about them was a bit frustrating The lies, the secrets, all the hurt took a toll on me It was so utterly heart breaking how much they hurt each other However, I also loved seeing how intensely they loved each other I felt for Mercy and can t imagine how she must have felt, but I was also rooting for Chase and Tommy to make it I want you You have me Whatever parts of me I can give you, you have themWhat I m doin to you ain t fair But as long as you want me, in pieces or whole, you have me This whole situation made me want to scream and hurl things at Chase and Tommy I also wanted to hug them so tight and kiss them everywhere I hated that Chase s mother committed suicide when he was a child I hated all of the verbal abuse he suffered by his drunkard father when he was growing up Reading Chase s inner self tore at my heart strings I just wanted him to okay I wanted Tommy to be okay, too I loved all the sweet moments in this book I loved all the endearing and passionate kisses they shared I loved all of their cuddling and playing house I loved that they had such amazing friends in their fellow porn stars I just plainly loved them together Yeah I want to live with you I want to live with you foreverI want a future A real future Not a movie set one I want an us Yes, this book was tragic and angsty, but it was also so beautiful After all that heartache and pain that this story caused me, I also got so much joy in the end It was not a light fluffy story by any means, it was raw and moving It was quite the experience but it was done so well It took me awhile to get use to the writing style, but once I did, I was enthralled by the story and characters There were was also some amazing steam in this book Hellothey were porn stars, of course the steam was going to be smoking hot The secondary characters were so wonderful also I m really curious about Dex The ending was so sweet and perfect I was so happy for them that I couldn t contain my smile This is definitely not for everyone but if you do decide to give this a go, remember to have tissues at hand.

  8. says:

    HEARTWRENCHING AND FULL OF DAMNED FEELS THE INTERCONTINENTAL MANIC MONDAY BUDDY READ with Eva, Isabel, Barbara, and Lucy This one was really really TOUGH to read This is my first solo Amy Lane read and now I understand how angsty her books are If you notice the cover has a door And if you read the story, Chase mentioned a red door that s always on his mind So I was inspired to share this little poem about a DOOR THE DOOR I touched the doorI opened the doorAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH I closed the door The door Very nice isn t it So now my thoughts about the book.Okay, the MC Chase Summers His character is probably the one I related the most out of the ones I ve read so far How I have a confession to make I live a double life too I m actually moonlighting as a sexy agogo dancer in a gay club at night Gyrating my sexy hips to the tune of Careless Whisper when I m on stage Kidding Let s just say I kinda found myself in a situation similar to Chase s.I had a girlfriend even though I considered myself gay already But I m not out then and I kept my sexuality from her And it was difficult hiding it from her I keep thinking that I will never be enough for her even though I loved her because I won t be able to give everything she needs So when everytime Chase thinks that Mercy deserves so much , it always strikes a chord in me I felt like my healed wounds are starting to open again It was unsettling.Eventually I came out to her and that ended our relationship But getting there was not easy at all So I understand that part of Chase that he gone through.I would like to applaud Ms Lane for being spot on in the characteristics of Chase and showing how it s like being closeted while in a hetero relationship If it was not, I wouldn t be affected this much Bravo Ma m Honestly, I m not sure if I like Chase Even though I understood what he s gone through, I don t approve his cheating Actually the whole story revolves around his affair with Tommy So if you guys don t like cheating in your books, beware with this I sympathize with him though, because it really is not easy losing one of your parents especially losing them to suicide I have a cousin who lost her mother to suicide and it was very difficult for her It will really fuck you up for life So please to the mothers fathers out there Don t kill yourselves During Chase s therapy, I ached for him Those scenes when he cries all the time, I felt like I wanna cry with him Just so he ll know that he s not in it alone That s where I started to like him I rated this 5 stars because it affected me so much and it really is a great great read But I have a lot of issues with this.I m not fond of the writing The sequence of events is confusing and dizzying It goes like this A chapter starts with a scene, then it will go back to an event before that and then finally it comes back to the scene from the beginning I had a hard time adjusting to that style for the first half of the book It s quite annoying.I m not sure how authentic some aspects of the books are The porn thing and the therapy So you have to suspend a little belief to enjoy this It was believable enough for me I actually enjoyed Chase s time with Johnnies Overall I actually loved and hated this book at the same time And I wouldn t be able finish it if it weren t for your encouragements SO THANK YOU GUYS D A RECOMMENDED read especially for those who love angst Enjoy guys Thank you for Eva for letting me join your BR and to Lucy, Barbara and Isabel for reading this with me Till the next BR guys Cheers

  9. says:

    Chase is a college student, working on his degree A baseball jock The All American boy Struggling, living with his girlfriend Mercy, the two work hard to maintain an apartment, and school, and plan, and save for a future.Chase comes from a harsh background Raised by his father after his mother committed suicide when he was a young boy, he s struggled to be the perfect son His father s scorn drives him to be , have , make no missteps.So when his friends mention a local gay filmmaking company that s scouting talent, he thinks it may be a way to make some quick cash Not to mention, a way to fulfill the part of him longing for another man s touch His fumblings with his best friend Donnie aside, he s only ever been with Mercy.Johnnie s, the porn site, is glad to have him He s mentored before his first shoot by Dex, and the two form an immediate friendship Then his first day on the set, he catches sight of Tango Hot, devilish, full of life, there s an immediate attraction Chase or Chance, his porn alter ego fits right in with these guys He has no trouble with the performance Revels in it Before long, he has the opportunity to meet and talk to Tango on a shoot The chemistry is there, but , another friendship is struck They begin to get closer, and when tragedy strikes Tango, Chase is the first he calls to help and be there.So begins a series of events that splits Chance in two On the one hand, he s the dutiful boyfriend and fianc to Mercy On the other, he s in a fledgling relationship with his soul mate, Tommy One he fights and which may ultimately blow up in his face Because he s struggling to keep secrets from his childhood, live two separate lives, and keep his head above the red water that threatens to drag him under.What will happen when his two worlds collide This book this beautiful, tragic and stunning book was at once a revelation, a blessing, and a stake through my heart A little background I m a 50 year old single gay man living in the suburbs of Atlanta I ve been in a couple of relationships, the most recent one for thirteen plus years I ve lost two men in my life to suicide, one a best friend and one a love who was living a double life And I ve worked with abused teens in a residential setting as CFO for a nonprofit agency.So the issues in this book hit me hard Young people with mental health issues Suicide Men living double lives Men who like other men, trying hard to live a straight lifestyle I respect the hell out of Amy Lane She takes on these hard issues and makes them bearable Relevant Painful but so damn I don t know, I can t find the words for it Brutally accessible I remember when The Thornbirds came out, and the legend behind it always struck me The bird stayed silent its whole life, searching for the thorn tree When it finds it, the bird pierces its breast on it and, as it dies, sings a song so sweet even God stops to listen And that s how I feel about Chase So repressed, so bottled up, and then, then when he finally sings, we all stop and gasp want to hold him and heal him and make him our own My own God No wonder it was so easy He s been bleeding since he was a baby This was a hard book to read for me And I would read it every day, just to hear Chase sing that hauntingly aching, soul searing song.Bless you, Amy Now I ll go wipe my eyes and take a deep breath and celebrate one sweet man who made it.Tom

  10. says:

    Another BR with awesome friends Chase in Shadow is a emotionally exhausting, and heart breaking story, I has left with some mixed feelings, and a heavy weight on my chest, such a fantastic writing of a person living in denial refusing to face the truth Although the story does bounce around a bite, I surely loved the intensity of Chase and Tommy s relationship, despite I didn t always agree with Chase attitudes, I loved seeing his interior struggles, and of course loved the porn stars was very entertaining You like a lot of angst very well written, go for it Thanks to Isabel, Eva, Lucy, and Alvin for reading this with me At the end we needed this